“Let’s move! The world ain’t saving itself!” G.I. Joe: Retaliation.

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GI Joe: Rise of the Cobra (2009) split audiences I feel, I think though if you can take a film in the way it is meant to come across, GI Joe is a winner. It’s full of one liners, guns, explosions, cool gadgets, banter, romance, violence, Ninjas (!) cool nicknames and just loads of fun. If you take the film out of context and criticise it too heavily you take all the fun out of it. I think you can see where I am going with this.

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The sequel, GI Joe: Retaliation is just the same if not BETTER. It starts by nicely wrapping up events that happened in the previous film and quickly explains what’s happening in present day. Nicely done, don’t beat around the bush! We know that Zartan is impersonating the President and along with Cobra Commander plans to take over the world. From the trailer you know that the ‘President’ tries to wipe out the Joe’s in an air strike, and so sets the story up for some explosive pay back! It’s not often that a sequel can trump its predecessor especially when new characters are introduced to a linear story, but for me casting Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson and Bruce Willis just tipped this film over to awesome.

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Aptly named Roadblock, Johnson plays part of Duke’s (Channing Tatum) Joe team and we get a little background to make sure the audience connects the two as friends. Tatum and Johnson’s banter is really funny and I liked their relationship – it’s a shame it doesn’t last long but I guess we should have seen that coming. Johnson really kicks some serious butt in this film and is looking mighty buff. He even get’s a sneaky wrestle in there with crazy old Firefly – played by Ray Stevenson which was an odd but great choice. Roadblock gets all the good lines and the biggest guns, basically I think I developed a bit of an infatuation with the big sweaty man after this film.

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You know what’s nice to see, a bit of eye candy for the ladies for a change. Yes there are some good looking women, but more on that later. Another new face is Flint played by DJ Cotrona , a Joe that starts off as a cocky character until he has the wind blown out of him by the air strike, but then doesn’t really develop into anything other than being gorgeous and fighting good. I’m not complaining. He kinda sorta has an almost love interest with Lady Jaye (Adrianne Palicki) but it could just be a wandering eye. Lady Jaye’s character was fun, bringing some strong female energy to the boys crew, and actually less obviously sexualised than women in the previous film but still looking damn hot.

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My only quibble with Lady Jaye was the five minutes spent explaining her daddy issues, not really necessary but made for a heart filled few seconds at the end of the film. There are some funny moments between her and Willis though, who plays the old school original Joe that maybe thinks combat isn’t for girls. I love Bruce (in spite of the last Die Hard catastrophe) and he didn’t let me down in GI Joe. He doesn’t steal the show and plays a small part in the story really but still a major asset to the film in my eyes. Unlike Jinx, Snake Eyes’ protégé played by Elodie Yung – she may fight like a Ninja but she acts like a child and what was that accent? I begged her to have less lines. I am sure she is wonderful in French cinema but I couldn’t take her seriously.

Couldn't help thinking she looked like a Power Ranger.

Couldn’t help thinking she looked like a Power Ranger.

Moving on! Loved seeing Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow battle it out again and very much enjoyed the surprise side story there too. In fact the Ninja’s kind of stole the show, what with the big fight scene on the side of a cliff – which was even better than the trailer lead me to believe, plus the star throwing, sword slicing and bullet dodging which by the way all looked brilliant even in 2D. When Storm Shadow got out those fork sword things I thought “Oooh I hope the Ninja Turtles film is going to be good!” There is also a lovely scene where Byung-hun Lee rips his top off and fights whilst dripping wet… I kid you not girls its a must see…

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GI Joe Retaliation has just enough violence, explosions, character interaction and story line to make a brilliant mind-less action film. There was some good use of the soundtrack too most memorably when Willis shows the team his weapons selection stashed around the house. As I said previously, you can’t take this film too seriously – if you do then you wont enjoy it. If like me you enjoy watching good looking men and women save the world (except London, that was an interesting choice) then GI Joe is for you!

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“In the immortal words of Jay-Z: “Whatever deity may guide my life, Dear Lord don’t let me die tonight!” When The Rock quotes Jay-Z before going into battle you know what you’re letting yourself in for…

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18 thoughts on ““Let’s move! The world ain’t saving itself!” G.I. Joe: Retaliation.

  1. CMrok93 April 10, 2013 at 9:22 pm Reply

    Good review. It’s a fun movie, even if it is still just a terribly stupid one. Oh well, can’t say I expected much.

    • myreelpov April 11, 2013 at 8:02 am Reply

      I have seen stupider movies for sure!

  2. Stan April 10, 2013 at 11:52 pm Reply

    Still have yet to see this but if you’re saying it’s following the route of the previous film, I should expect very little brain matter being tested and another live action version of Team America on the Rock(s). Perfik.

    • myreelpov April 11, 2013 at 8:03 am Reply

      Yes definitely, but even better than the first. Less cartoony and more action. Thanks for commenting 🙂

  3. Sir Phobos April 11, 2013 at 3:31 am Reply

    I thought it was loads better than the first. You’re right, everything that had to do with the ninjas was bad ass, the cliff battle being the best of it all.

    Sucks for London!

    • myreelpov April 11, 2013 at 8:04 am Reply

      I loved the Ninjas! Ninjas + The Rock + Bruce Willis = awesome.

  4. kierontownend April 11, 2013 at 9:17 am Reply

    Nice to see your writers block is over 🙂 Good review.

    • myreelpov April 11, 2013 at 11:14 am Reply

      Thank you very much! 🙂

  5. lukebbtt April 11, 2013 at 11:10 am Reply

    I thought Bruce Willis was meant to be Lady Jaye’s dad. I mean, it makes their relationship make so much sense, but it was never mentioned. Maybe that twist is being saved for a third one.

    • myreelpov April 11, 2013 at 11:16 am Reply

      Well I thought he was as well because at the end I thought I heard “You served with your father and he is proud of you” bum bum baaa he’s her dad?! But I was later told he said “I served with your father and he’d be proud of you” lol! Woops!

  6. Hypersonic55 April 11, 2013 at 4:00 pm Reply

    Good review yo and interesting opinions on the film. At least Retaliation was better than that horrible Rise of the Cobra in 2009. This film just there for me, decent but nothing overly entertaining, for the most part it made me laugh but that was for all the wrong reasons. I’m such pesky person when it comes to action films, if I’m not wowed by something then I am pretty hard the film in question. This wasn’t bad but I only liked it for The Rock, we was, is and always will be badass!

    • myreelpov April 12, 2013 at 11:45 am Reply

      Well I think its ok to laugh, if you take this film seriously you just ruin it for yourself. It is a bit of fun, not like they were trying to create a serious piece of drama lol!

  7. Nostra May 13, 2013 at 9:16 pm Reply

    Interesting review. Personally I”m someone who can really enjoy action movies, but I just was not able to do so with this one, the 3D was bad and because of it the action scenes did not work for me either. Bruce Willis added nothing to the movie and the whole ninja thing was out of place.

    • myreelpov May 13, 2013 at 9:18 pm Reply

      I disagree, but I am bias when it comes to Bruce Willis!

      • Nostra May 13, 2013 at 9:23 pm

        Maybe it was because I had just seen the latest Die Hard, it might have jaded my thoughts about him in this movie…

      • myreelpov May 13, 2013 at 9:23 pm

        Ah well I am pretending that didn’t happen!

      • Nostra May 13, 2013 at 9:25 pm

        Yeah, so do I….which I actually do for several other movie series as well. For example I know for a fact that Terminator 2 was the last Terminator movie which was made….

  8. My Reel POV’s Top 10 of 2013. | MyReelPOV January 17, 2014 at 12:58 pm Reply

    […] of Smaug, Elysium, Aint Them Bodies Saints, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Thor: The Dark World, GI Joe: Retaliation, Captain Phillips, Kick-Ass 2 and The Worlds […]

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